I am going to share excerpts of my personal journal from two years ago. This entry begins with a Bible study invitation of which I had no idea would bring about an answer to a long prayed over request. For the record: It was the longest petition, to date, that I had ever prayed over a matter with such intensity. This was not my first choice of a Bible study, due to the heavy dysfunctional life experiences it was geared toward, but it was the Bible study my daughter and her side kick wanted to do. As it turned out the videos for my choice of study were not available at the time through our church so I borrowed the videos the girls favored. I had been through this same study twelve years ago and I knew, back then, that one day I would take my daughter through it. I was so certain of this that I bought the study book for her twelve years ago. As I prayed over leading the study for our mother/daughter group I sensed God was up to something; something big.
I am going to leave blank a name and situation in my journal entry. Please know the day is coming when I will be at liberty to share the details.
On December 18, 2011 I sent this email to my Bible study group consisting of eight moms and our combined ten teen daughters:
Breaking Free: Making Liberty in Christ a Reality in Life will be our next study and I am really looking forward to it.
Please email me your prayer requests that day if possible and I will print them out ahead of time to save some precious time on this first night. I will attempt to send a courtesy reminder about this.
I am excited about this study in a way I have not been for previous studies. Can’t wait to see what God is up to!
Blessings and Merry Christmas,
March 7, 2012
While viewing the week 4 video of Breaking Free: Rebuilding the Ancient Ruins by Beth Moore, I had something replay in my memory from an earlier study on Esther also by Beth Moore. It was about a reversal of sorts called a chiastic structure. Think of it as a reversal of destiny or a reversal of fortunes. Since doing the ‘Breaking Free’ study twelve years ago I have been delivered from the chains and bars of ________. Now I will pray that to the chains and bars of prison, ____, will be delivered. I’m reminded that my Jesus can do it! I will daily ask for it and not take no for an answer regarding the safety of my family, children, and children of other families. _______ made war on us and many others through the years and I am declaring our victory over ______. I will pray it into existence beginning with God’s word which is alive and active and sharper than any two edge sword. And I will pray it out loud of course because scripture sets the precedence that there is power in the spoken word.
Psalm 107:17 (NIV)
Some became fools through their rebellious ways and suffered affliction because of their iniquities.
Proverbs 13:16 (NIV)
All who are prudent act with knowledge, but fools expose their folly.
Proverbs 16:22 (NIV)
Prudence is a fountain of life to the prudent, but folly brings punishment to fools.
Proverbs 18:6 (NIV) – The lips of fools bring them strife, and their mouths invite a beating.
Proverbs 18:7 (NIV) – The mouths of fools are their undoing, and their lips are a snare to their very lives.
Ecclesiastes 4:5 (NIV) – Fools fold their hands and ruin themselves.
Psalm 52 (NIV)
1 Why do you boast of evil, you mighty hero?
Why do you boast all day long,
you who are a disgrace in the eyes of God?
2 You who practice deceit,
your tongue plots destruction;
it is like a sharpened razor.
3 You love evil rather than good,
falsehood rather than speaking the truth.
4 You love every harmful word,
you deceitful tongue!
5 Surely God will bring you down to everlasting ruin:
He will snatch you up and pluck you from your tent;
he will uproot you from the land of the living.
6 The righteous will see and fear;
they will laugh at you, saying,
7 “Here now is the man
who did not make God his stronghold
but trusted in his great wealth
and grew strong by destroying others!”
8 But I am like an olive tree
flourishing in the house of God;
I trust in God’s unfailing love
for ever and ever.
9 For what you have done I will always praise you
in the presence of your faithful people.
And I will hope in your name,
for your name is good.
April 19, 2012
Early morning – Working on my Breaking Free bible study this morning, Week 9 The Steadfast Mind, Day 1 –“A View from the Old.” “God will never send us into the valley and ask us to bow to His authority there without sooner or later bringing a harvest from the ground watered by our sweat and tears.” The personal discussion question is, “By any chance, are you still waiting to see the first signs of fruit from a previous valley? If so, can you think of ways God could use the lapse of time to bring forth an even greater harvest?”
I decided to see what my answers were twelve years ago when I did this study for the first time.
#1. Riley’s protection from _______. #2. My deliverance from ________ . # 3. ________ being permanently removed from the ministry. As for the lapse of time I will wait, trust and obey. God is so much smarter and more creative than me which once again makes me glad He’s my God. I know He’s working it out; I just have no idea how.
Now I’m praising God for #1. Done! #2. Done! God provided for our protection. #3. I know God is speaking to my heart, soul, mind and strength at this very moment. “Child, I’m bringing you full circle this week; week nine, day one from the time you wrote these words twelve years ago.”
I now have chills all over me and I’m laughing, crying and thanking God. Weeping. Tears of joy. Tears of awe. “I am overwhelmed at Your goodness.” Hot tears falling down my face. “Who I am I that you allow me this piece of information? This peace? It has been such a long wait but I’ve always known you were working it out. Oh my…this week? It’s going to happen this week. You are so good, God. You are so good. This is so like You!” I felt like God lifted me up from the depths of years of toiling through heartache and allowed me to reach the top of the mountain that I had been telling, “Move, in the name of Jesus.” God was allowing me to see that the time had come. The mountain had moved.
Unbeknownst and unseen by me God was using the lapse of time to bring, not just temporary protection and deliverance but, permanent protection and deliverance. Protection and deliverance I could not provide. How can He love us this much? He is such a magnificent mystery to me and His word is a stunning tapestry of which I never tire of finding beautiful new threads woven throughout the pages. The Bible is like buried treasure and the more I study it the more wealth I find. Wealth of who He is and there is always more of Him to find.
3:00 p.m.—Chasady, my sister, just called to tell me she googled ___________and found a forum post saying _____________ had been arrested and was sitting in jail. By the time I got off of the phone I wanted to find a place to just go have a good cry; however, I was in a doctor’s office sitting with my boys and didn’t have the liberty to ‘take 5’ for a very needed cry of relief and thanksgiving. I did have my time alone with God after we arrived home.
I thought God meant He would be placing in motion this week the harvest of fruit from our sweat, tears and prayers, but no He meant: Today! “Child, I’m bringing you full circle this week; week nine, day one from the time you wrote these words twelve years ago.”
I’ll never get over God! Ever. Not on earth. Not in heaven. I will declare His goodness, faithfulness, protection, provision and love all the days of my life. Then I will transfer to eternal praises! The best part of that is I will finally have a beautiful voice; pitch perfect praise.
There were some happy (and teary) moms and daughters celebrating and bragging on the goodness of our God for the answer of our group’s prayer over the last year. We had committed this request to God; asking Him what His heart and will was for this situation. We then asked Him for it; in the name of Jesus!