Listen…to her weary heart

This is a series of writings from women living in difficult, disappointing, or destructive marriages…or leaving destructive marriages/relationships. When women are physically abused the harm is often visible, but what about verbal and emotional abuse? The injury is internal…on the heart, soul, mind and strength. You may never guess her husband rages in a different way but the family knows. Her body knows and it often manifests in depression, anxiety, and/or auto-immune diseases. Allow me to show you the inner cries of these women’s hearts.

These are all true accounts from women I personally know.

weary 4

This friend suffered the breakup of her marriage after finding out her husband had molested a child. Her disappointing and destructive marriage led to divorce. Fortunately her husband admitted to the behavior, a crime against a young adolescent, and now he sits in jail. I am thankful for her that she didn’t have to wait years or decades for justice to be served. 

Krissy had been a stay-at-home, homeschooling mom since starting her family thirteen years earlier. She is living any woman’s worst nightmare while having the sole responsibility of meeting her children’s emotional, physical, financial and spiritual needs. Krissy and her children had to leave their home. The kids not only had their family dynamics change, they have also enrolled in public school so Krissy can go back to work full-time. You may be thinking, “Great, she was able to get a full-time job and take care of her kids.” If only it were that simple. Krissy didn’t have the necessary skills to find a job to cover the bare minimum of expenses. You may remember around two and a half years ago I published a GoFundMe account fundraiser for Krissy.  She had no money and needed financial help to get her family settled and on the road to recovery. She needed moving expenses, food, school supplies, clothes, Christian counseling, gas, utilities, insurance…

What you may not realize is that when the main financial provider goes to prison the spouse and children receive no alimony or child support payments. 

These have been Krissy’s toughest years and she has felt like she’s almost drowning in the difficulties and loneliness of single parenting and singleness. 

Here are her raw emotions she recently cried out to the Lord.

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ 

 

I have come to the place where you last met me..

I have come hoping it is now holy ground…

I have come before you naked and weary…

I have come to see you face to face..

I have come to feel the light of your glory..

I have come to seek you in this place…

And I know… With all that I have in me…

That I am yours to treasure or dispose of…

I am yours to comfort or to tear down…

I am yours to lift up or lay lowly…

I am yours to do with as you want to…

But, Lord just please don’t leave me here…

Used with permission/2018

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Writer, wife, imperfect home schooling mom to 3 amazing humans. Writing about lessons learned from surviving 100% of my worst days. Educating the church about domestic violence & abuse in their midst. Advocating for abused women living in, or leaving destructive marriages. Living an A.I.P. life. St. Louis Cardinals fanatic! Football fan.

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