Read more

Pedophile or Molester?

Here are the differences between pedophiles and molesters. The one thing they have in common: they don’t change.

read more Pedophile or Molester?

Advertisements

Abuse of Faith part 3: 10 reasons abusers keep preying

Abuse of Faith Part 3: How do so many get buy with it? Grandiose acting & the help of enablers. Or…people who want to pretend it isn’t true so they refuse to listen or read the facts. If this is you…you’re creating the perfect scenario for your child, loved one or church family to be victimized. READ an abuser’s letter to a missionary and see how it happens.

read more Abuse of Faith part 3: 10 reasons abusers keep preying

Toxic Tuesday: Justice Served Super-Sized for Children’s Sake

Dear readers,
This is real life and reality isn’t always pretty with bright sunny days, snuggly soft puppy dogs and beautifully spoken words. Sometimes life is unbearable and the content of today’s post qualifies for the later. I’m warning you in advance that some of the content is heavy and ugly.

read more Toxic Tuesday: Justice Served Super-Sized for Children’s Sake

Toxic Tuesday: The Supernatural

Toxic Tuesday biochem hazard

 

Last week provided opportunity for me to sit down with my children and use our prayer tool box. I take this prayer box out when I want to spend lengthy concentrated prayer on an issue or need.

Last week such a need was upon us. There was a possibility of seeing a long-awaited prayer request answered concerning a toxic person from our past. This toxic person had wreaked havoc in four innocent children’s lives that we knew of and possibly, according to investigators, in hundreds of other children’s lives. After sixteen years of praying for children’s safety I could possibly see God’s hand provide permanent protection. I believed I had received the answer to the prayerrequest over two years previous but felt the pressing duty to pray it into being.

Please understand I was not fighting against a person. I fought for the safety of children from childhood victimization but more than that; I fought for their heart, soul, mind and strength. Because perhaps nothing can mess with a child’s heart, soul mind and strength more than being victimized in the name of Jesus while being told how special they are, how loved they are, and that God is going to use them in great ways for His work. ENOUGH! There are things worth fighting for, through the power of prayer, and this was one of them.

By products would be the vengeance of the Lord, vindication from my past for the hundreds of people who never knew the truth of why I left this relationship, and a reminder to those who knew but refused to do anything about it that God knows all, sees all, and will hold them accountable for the harm that came to the children.

I was in desperate need to see God’s final answer of justice, in this case, on this side of heaven, “Please Lord?”

“A hostile world! I call to God, I cry to God to help me. From his palace he hears my call; my cry brings me right into his presence— a private audience!” Psalm 18:6 (The Message)

Ah yes, that is how I feel every time I take out our prayer tool box; in His presence—a private audience!

Here are two of the prayer cards we filled out during our time praying for justice in this court case.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Write your own Psalm 100 by filling in the blanks—

 

Know that the Lord is powerful and in charge

It is He who brought this child abuser to trial

And we are His prayer warriors praying for justice

Enter His arms little children with assurance of rest and healing,

Give praise to Him and trust and glorify His name.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Describe how you are asking God to work in this circumstance:

A mazingly swift

B elieve the children (jury)

C omfort the children

D eliver defendant to prison

E mpower prosecutor & team

F inish the trail this week

G uilty verdict

H elp children to remember

I ntercessor for the witnesses

J udicious

K indness toward children from the defense

L ove the children tenderly

M ighty to save

N ever forget what happened

O verwhelm the jury with truth

P eace while giving testimony

Q uiet the court room

R emember the victims

S ave the children from fear

T welve guilty verdicts

U understand defendant’s history & character (jury)

V indicate the children

W onderful counselor

X tremely wise jury

Y ielding professional testimony

Z ealous for the children; the apples of Jesus’ eyes

 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

We were extremely bold in our asking; after all, the book of Psalms sets the precedence for asking boldly for victory against our foes.

“For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.” Ephesians 6:12

Two days later I was present in court to hear the verdict with my own ears: Guilty.

See previous post: “Mene, Mene, Tekel, Parsin

We need to wake up, pray up and speak up. Sin, specifically childhood victimization, wants to shut us down and shut us up but God has so much more for us.  God wants us to join Him where ever we see Him working; including protecting children. Jesus left His believers supernatural power to get the work done. “Very truly I tell you, whoever believes in me will do the works I have been doing, and they will do even greater things than these, because I am going to the Father.” John 14:12

So I will boldly speak out. God’s church has often been quiet about childhood victimization sometimes treating the victims as the problem. Why? Because it is an uncomfortable ugly topic and it is next to impossible for many people to believe abusers, molesters and pedophiles exist.  They would rather not talk about it and if they must; please leave the shocking terminology out of the conversation. Smooth it over, soften it, make it nicer. No one should have to hear about such things.

I strongly disagree. Many Christians need to wake up, know the facts and do everything they can to protect the children; at the very least, believe the children and pray for them.

We must participate in God’s cause, battle and victory against the forces of darkness. Bad things happen in real life. You can’t hush it, soften it, rewrite it or ignore it. Be real! Childhood victimization is real! If we will not intercede for the children, who will? If we will not bring to light the sin hidden in darkness no one will.

Do you know of a toxic person who needs brought to justice? Join God and fight for the children. Pray.

Here are two links to help you with prayer tools as you take on remembering to effectively pray.

DSCN1898Prayer Tool Box: https://chocolateorelse.wordpress.com/?s=prayer+tool+box

Prayer boardPrayer Board: https://chocolateorelse.wordpress.com/?s=prayer+board

 

Here are three links with helpful scriptures to pray over abused children and the abusers.

https://chocolateorelse.wordpress.com/2014/05/31/p-r-a-y-e-r-for-innocent-children/

https://chocolateorelse.wordpress.com/2014/06/03/pedophile-or-molester-content-warning/

https://chocolateorelse.wordpress.com/2014/06/06/mene-mene-tekel-parsin/

 

P R A Y E R acronym

 

word filled linkup

Pedophile or Molester? *Content Warning

Toxic Tuesday biochem hazard

WARNING: GRAPHIC WRITTEN CONTENT

 

Diagnostic criteria for pedophilia

Pedophilia is a well-known disorder. It’s defined by the American Psychiatric Association in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, DSM-IV-TR.

To be diagnosed with pedophilia, a person must:

  • be sexually aroused by, have intense, recurring sexual fantasies of, or be involved in sexual behavior with a prepubescent child or children (generally 13 years or younger);
  • be aroused by, have sexual fantasies of, or be involved with a child for at least six months.;
  • be at least 16 years old, and
  • be at least five years older than the child or children he or she is attracted to.

 

Let’s say a man with sexual addictions toward children was caught multiple times over the last two decades; although investigators in different states who have investigated are certain the history goes back to early teenage years and most likely includes dozens, possibly hundreds, of victims. He likes very young children both boys and girls with brown hair. Is he a pedophile or a molester?

Is there a difference between being a pedophilic sex offender and being a molester?

Answer: Yes

The media tends to use these terms as synonyms (a word having the same or nearly the same meaning as another) though they are not. Although both pedophilic sex offenders and molesters abuse children; statistically pedophilic offenders have a ‘look’ or ‘type’ of child they prey upon plus they victimize more children over time.

 

Pedophiles and Child Molesters: The Differences

Although virtually all pedophilic sex offenders are child molesters, not all child molesters are pedophilic sex offenders. Pedophiles have a clear sexual attraction for children. The focus of a pedophile is a child or children generally under the age of 13. Pedophiles often report they are attracted to children in a particular age range (DSM-IV), build, look, hair or eye color. Pedophilic sex offenders are those who act on their attraction to children by violating a child.  Child molesters are sexual offenders who have committed either intra-familial sexual offense (incest) against a child victim or extra-familial sexual offenses against a child victim or both.

Pedophilic Sex Offenders:

  • True offenders may abuse family members, but the majority of their offenses is extra-familial and is directed toward vulnerable children whom they court or groom for the purpose of victimization. Their relationships with children are based on exploitation of the children for sexual gratification.
  • Offenders, who seek out children to victimize by placing themselves in positions of trust, authority, and easy access to youngsters, can have hundreds of victims over the course of their lifetimes.
  • Offenders, especially those who molest boys, or both boys and girls, are the sex offenders who have the highest recidivism (relapse) rates after incarceration and/or treatment.
  • Offenders frequently are uncomfortable with adult intimacy and may spend their lives maneuvering to be near children. They may be extremely charming and skilled at manipulating adults, and they may use adult relationships to gain access to children.
  • The pedophilic sex offender may spend years working up to a position of authority and trust within a church, school, or youth organization in order to have access to children. Of course, most such individuals in these types of authoritative positions have no sexual interest in children.

Child Molesters:

  • The non-pedophilic molester is someone whose primary sexual orientation includes adults, but who may molest children in a maladaptive attempt to meet emotional needs.
  • Research has found that many men who molest their own children or related female children have sexual interests that are indistinguishable from those of non-offending males.
  • Data suggest incestuous offenders, regardless of the gender of the victim, have lower numbers of victims and are less likely to be rearrested for new sex crimes after they have been convicted.
  • A child molester may turn to a child for sex out of a perceived inability to be close with an adult partner, out of poor self-esteem, or to escape feelings of powerlessness and loneliness. This type of offender usually has had appropriate (but often dysfunctional) relationships with peers and may be married

 

—Outcome studies have demonstrated consistently low rates of recidivism (relapse) for incestuous only offenders.

Retired FBI special agent, Nancy Fisher, says pedophiles and molesters don’t change.

“I’ve never had a success with a child pornographer or pedophile, never, not one, ever, ever, ever, ever. They never change,” said Fisher.

Read more: http://www.myfoxaustin.com/story/18258238/crimewatch-difference-between-pedophiles-child-molesters#ixzz33XhQaJZl

No cure for pedophilia has been developed. A number of proposed treatment techniques for pedophilia have been developed, though the success rate of these therapies has been very low.[1] Medications are used to lower sex drive in pedophiles by interfering with the activity of testosterone, such as with Depo-Provera (medroxyprogesterone acetate), Androcur (cyproterone acetate), and Lupron (leuprolide acetate).

The Mayo Clinic reports perpetrators who meet the diagnostic criteria for pedophilia offend more often than non-pedophile perpetrators, and with a greater number of victims. They state that approximately 95% of child sexual abuse incidents are committed by the 88% of child molestation offenders who meet the diagnostic criteria for pedophilia.[2] A behavioral analysis report by the FBI states that a “high percentage of acquaintance child molesters are preferential sex offenders who have a true sexual preference for [prepubescent] children (i.e., true pedophiles)”.[3]

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Please pray this Psalms over innocent children who have been abused. May their day of justice be upon them.

Psalm 3

Lord, how many are my foes!
How many rise up against me!
Many are saying of me,
“God will not deliver him.”

But you, Lord, are a shield around me,
my glory, the One who lifts my head high.
I call out to the Lord,
and he answers me from his holy mountain.

I lie down and sleep;
I wake again, because the Lord sustains me.
I will not fear though tens of thousands
assail me on every side.

Arise, Lord!
Deliver me, my God!
Strike all my enemies on the jaw;
break the teeth of the wicked.

From the Lord comes deliverance.
May your blessing be on your people.

 

Psalm 27

The Lord is my light and my salvation—
whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life—
of whom shall I be afraid?

When the wicked advance against me
to devour me,
it is my enemies and my foes
who will stumble and fall.
Though an army besiege me,
my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
even then I will be confident.

 

Psalm 54

Save me, O God, by your name;
vindicate me by your might.
Hear my prayer, O God;
listen to the words of my mouth.

Arrogant foes are attacking me;
ruthless people are trying to kill me—
people without regard for God.

Surely God is my help;
the Lord is the one who sustains me.

Let evil recoil on those who slander me;
in your faithfulness destroy them.

P R A Y E R acronym

Previous post: https://chocolateorelse.wordpress.com/2014/05/31/p-r-a-y-e-r-for-innocent-children/

____________________________________________________________________________

1.  Crawford, David (1981). “Treatment approaches with pedophiles”. Adult sexual interest in children. 181–217.

2.  Lanning, Kenneth (2001). “Child Molesters: A Behavioral Analysis (Third Edition)” (PDF). National Center for Missing & Exploited Children. pp. 25, 27, 29.

3.  Hall RC, Hall RC (2007). “A profile of pedophilia: definition, characteristics of offenders, recidivism, treatment outcomes, and forensic issues”. Mayo Clin. Proc. 82 (4): 457–71. doi:10.4065/82.4.457PMID 17418075.